Ideas Are Powerful

Yesterday was my son's 4th birthday. BIG deal in his little world. He felt like he had waited FOREVER for this day. It was so much fun to watch him enjoy his day...a day about which he had a very specific idea about what was suppose to happen. Presents, cupcakes and a pinata...anything less would have been a disappointment because his idea was so powerful!

Today in church the sermon was about how powerful ideas are. Ideas shape people, relationships, communities, countries and the world. God reconciled the world to Himself...God declared dignity to ALL...and as the sermon stated today "reconciliation and forgiveness should characterize our relationships". Reconciliation and forgiveness should be the powerful idea we embrace.

After reflecting on both my son's party and the sermon today I couldn't agree more that "ideas are powerful...watch what you embrace". My son had such a strong idea about how "his day" should go. He embraced the idea that his Batman themed party should start exactly when he wanted it to, he should get presents, eat cupcakes and bang candy out of a pinata. This idea shaped his attitude and his actions.

Upon all this reflecting...I was reminded of one HUGE flaw of mine. I don't forgive quickly. I hold on to the idea that people should do or act a certain way and when they don't I am upset...they owe me for my perceived wrong doing...and I wait for them to make it right. But you know what? It just continues to hurt me and my family...and it makes me not a good example.

What ideas do you embrace? Do you truly embrace forgiveness (i.e. really believe that people no longer owe you)? Forgiveness is the most powerful idea. How I embrace that (or not embrace) that teaches my family how to do that or not do that. To not count others trespasses means just that...forgive...embrace the powerful idea of forgiveness. So I realized today that I act like my 4 year old son...wow... embarrassing! At least he has an excuse...what's mine?

I like to think I am a good example of kindness and goodness and forgiveness to my kids. But the reality is...I fail a lot. So I will work harder to forgive...to not count trespasses but reconcile and forgive because that's what God did for me and that's what He is asking I do for others. That's His powerful idea.

So back to my son's 4th birthday...luckily kids are forgiving (however lofty their ideas are and however firmly they embrace them). My son has already forgotten that the party didn't start on time and that I almost forgot to sing "Happy Birthday". He told me it was his "best day ever". My prayer tonight will be that I forgive and forget like my son (and like God did for me). That I embrace the most powerful idea of all...FORGIVENESS...and that I let my soul embrace the powerful ideas of God and not the petty ideas I hold so each day can be my "best day ever".

Steel Magnolias - Gordon Style

Let me take you back to 1989. The movie "Steel Magnolias" has many awesome parts mostly centered around women and their bond through family and friendship but one hilarious part (that I never thought I'd be living in real life) is when M'Lynn (Sally Field) and her husband Drum (Tom Skeritt) are setting up for Shelby's (Julia Roberts) outdoor wedding. Drum is obsessed with the birds in the trees and gets his gun and starts shooting at the birds shortly before the wedding. It's a much funnier scene to watch than my recap of it. But you get the idea...so here's the "Gordon Style".

Unlike M'Lynn...I know where my husband's BB Gun is and I haven't admitted it. We have birds that have taken a liking to our house...first the tall entry way on the front porch and now the turbine on the top of the house. I don't notice the chirping very often but apparently it is annoying the hell out of my husband. He wants to find his BB Gun and shoot at the freakin birds. I can think of so many things going wrong here. He could break a window (on our house or the neighbors), he could fall off the roof and shoot himself...so many horrible possibilities. The most likely being that he would shoot at the birds...perhaps hit one, not kill it but injure it. Then we'd have an injured bird in our yard. It didn't do anything to the overall bird "problem" but now we have a half dead bird to deal with. So...to avoid all of these scenarios I don't admit or deny that I know where the BB Gun is.

Is that bad?

"...Not Cool Mom"

I am quickly learning how serious the life of a 5 year old and 3 year old are. There are some "big deals" in their little lives and somehow I've managed to upset them multiple times this week (and yes it's only Wednesday) by not understanding.

This week my 5 year old was going on a field trip to a strawberry farm. The weather had dropped enough that warmer clothes were needed. Not to mention the fact that her legs look like she's a soccer player who doesn't wear pads (she plays non-stop and doesn't even notice when she gets a new bruise). I wanted to keep her warm, bug bite free and injury free...so I put her in jeans (skirts are the favorite and almost exclusive wardrobe). J-E-A-N-S?!?!?! Wow...how could I do that?! According to her, not only are they not girly but they are not bendy either.

For the one millionth time that day my 3 year old asked me to "play with him". That's what I do...when I need a break I throw a load of laundry in, do the dishes or take a grandparent to a doctor's appointment. Outside of that...I play with him. This particular time...I didn't jump to "play with him"...I grabbed a pillow from the couch and laid my head on it...to which he responded..."not cool Mom".

And as all of you know kids (and men) think anything about "tooting" or "pooping" is hilarious. My kids are no exception. So my daughter's tummy was making noises and I told her she was digesting her food. She asked what digesting meant. I told her that after she eats her tummy digests food which means it takes all the good parts out of the food to help her grow and be healthy and then it takes all the left over or not good parts and her body gets rid of it. Of course she asks me how...and I tell her it comes out in poop (which of course makes her laugh until she's crying she thinks it SO funny). Fast forward a few days...and at the dinner table we're finished eating and she asks to be excused. She says with the biggest grin on her face...my tummy is digesting and the food is turning brown and I have to poop out the corn. The American Corn (she says thru constant laughter). I asked her what "American Corn" was (and please note we didn't even have corn for dinner). She said...you know corn grown in America. Only people from American can eat this corn. Excuse me while I go digest.

There are so many funny things that are said and done in my family I couldn't possibly write about them all. And they are so good I couldn't make up stories this great. And while I try not to laugh when my kids say or do something that might be considered inappropriate...it's very hard because sometimes it's just so dang funny! These little people that we are given for such a short time are brilliant! They are full of life, learning and love...and they're honest. They say how they feel and I love that! We could all take a lesson from them...play hard, be real and continue loving until it's "...not cool Mom".

Elastigirl

For those of you who have children...or husbands who enjoy children's movies (you know who you are)...Elastigirl is from the movie "The Incredibles". This is fresh on my mind because my 3 year old is obsessed with this movie right now. The Incredibles are a family of 5 and each of them has a super power. Elastigirl is the mom and she is extremely flexible. She can be stretched in a million different directions and she always goes back to her "normal" self after saving the day by literally spreading herself thin.

I am Elastigirl...and I'm great with that. I run from bed to shower to breakfast table. From home to school to grocery store. Doctors appointments, oil changes, play dates, homework, dinner, bath and bedtime...you name it I do it. And I'm so blessed to be able to! God must have known that I would need to be Elastigirl someday.

The hardest part for Elastigirl is establishing boundaries. How far is too far? How stretched is too stretched? Even if she could...should she? I think Elastigirl's character flaw (i.e. my character flaw...it's just easier to talk about someone else) is that she doesn't established boundaries...with herself or those around her. Just because she can "save the day" doesn't mean she should. It's ok to say "no". It's ok if people are upset because they hear "no". Elastigirl doesn't love those around her any less when she tells them "no"...she's just honoring herself and who God made her to be and allowing others to be what God wanted them to be...responsible.

I am praying for Elastigirl. I want her to establishes boundaries. It will be uncomfortable at first (as all things worth anything are)...but God made Elastigirl with BOTH the ability to be flexible AND the ability to establish boundaries.

I'll end with a quote from Elastigirl:

"Your identity is your most valuable possession. Protect it. And if anything goes wrong, use your powers."

I'm a SAHM

I'm 3 days in to being a SAHM (stay at home mom). I can see already I have a lot to learn. So far I've worked myself silly cleaning closets, organizing drawers, reviewing our new "budget", planning "learning time" and playing with my 3 year old son (not to mention establishing routine and discipline).

Fortunately I live in a neighborhood with lots of SAHMs. They are giving me tips on transitioning from two incomes to one, entertaining kids for free, eating out inexpensively and grocery shopping on a budget. This is a whole new world for me. I've spent the last 14 years working on my career of which the last 5 I learned to balance work and being a mommy (at least making a decent attempt).

Because I'm a mom I can handle all things...right? It has been challenging the last 3 months. In summary I got laid off, spent the next 3 months aggressively job searching and interviewing, dealing with some medical concerns with my children and coming to the decision to turn down three amazing job offers and transition from career mom to stay at home mom.

In the midst of all this turmoil I can honestly say I find pockets of peace. When I take my daughter to school AND pick her up...I find peace. When my son tells me he loves me for no reason at all and we take a walk in the middle of the day...I find peace. I have to hold tight to those pockets...because life is messy. Between my husband receiving a hanging spider in the mail when he expected bird deflector caulk (long story), telling your son it is not ok to call mommy "naughty" and reminding your daughter that nice girls don't use "potty words" you have to have those "peace pockets".

What I'm already recognizing is that life is not measured by margin and revenue but by presence and sweet hugs.